If it's Tuesday, this must be ...

Made it thru the weekend in one piece. This business, this start-up thing, plays right havoc with everything from the toes up. Even my days off feel heavy and wet.

Not a sou.

Imagine being on the edge of your best, like Icharus (pre-free-fall) and no wind at your back. Now add in doubt (lotsuvit) and subtract faith, and what are you left with?

For me, it's this haunted feeling; a peculiar wonderment. This strange dualism between peace and the screaming heebies.

This morning at Mass I was so incredibly comforted by all the invisible nurse-angels who rush around applying holy salve to wordly wounds. In the presence of Jesus, I dream, sort-of; I sleep, sort-of; and I fight … constantly to stay awake throughout the surgery.

I can see it, because I have eyes to see.

The net of it is, after receiving Him, I always come away feeling better, and this “better” seems to stick around a while, like some Holy Spirit-infused mist, until the real stuff comes bludgeoning back in.

But even then, I’m poked full of God in some big, mystical way, able to carry on.

So I guess even when it's bad, it can still be kinda beautiful.

You?